My Wishes

I want to meet you and fall in love with you
I want to write your name in the blue sky
I want to shout your name out loud from the mountain’s top

I want shyly kiss you on your ear and pretend as if it wasn’t me
I want feel your warmth and hear your heartbeats too
I want to sit next to you in a bus and lay my head over your shoulder and dream about us
I want to retire in your arms at the end of the day and forget everything else
I want to be mad at you for every stupid and dumb reason, and want you to beg for forgiveness
I want to believe you when you say romantic stolen lines and proclaim it was an original
I want to tell you, you made me crazy and blind and you have committed a non-bailable offence
I want to surrender my soul to you , my sweetheart and pray for god to be with us


:))))

Tera Na Hona Jane, Kyun Hona Hi Hai

Tera Na Hona Jane, Kyun Hona Hi Hai

Tera Na Hona Jane, Kyun Hona Hi Hai
Tum Se Hi Din Hota Hai, Surmaiye Shaam Aati, Tumse Hi, Tumse Hi
Har Ghadi Saans Aati Hai, Zindagi Kehlati Hai, Tumse Hi, Tumse Hi


I always catch this song everytime Jab We Met is shown on TV ,But I'm not complaining...I simply love this song.


And the memories associated with it as well...

My latest weapon - Positive ignorance

There's a lot to it. Like, ignore saying something that will hurt someone. It is understandably difficult to put in practice in tense situations. Only patience helps in such cases, tolerance too. Further, if you've gotten struck and it hurts too badly, rather use some healing time instead of vulnerably trying to fight back. Also try to treat yourself with some time off, alone, and as such prevent the circumstance of diverting your anger on someone else. Enough said than done, it's better to be a person of your deeds.

Varying with a saga of instances and/or situations of course, "It hurts more when you say something and wish you had not said it. Basically, because if you said something bad, there is no way to take it back. If you said nothing, the only regret is that you could have said something; no damage done. It's not as bad as saying something and wishing you never said it."

Do not let frustration control your actions or the words you speak. Curb the clampdown created within by means of meditation. Try it (meditation) with your heart and mind in it. You will find your soul talking back to you. Really sensational, truly sensational. Learn to listen to your soul, it's all within. No need to go anywhere else but to yourself. Always remember, that 'you can help you better than anyone else.'

Positive ignorance is deeply connected to positive thinking. Now I’m sure you know how or at least what positive thinking is. Go on then, amaze yourself with the strength and power to get rid of ineptness. You can do it, and if you can, you should. No regrets!

Peace! :))))

On the back of an autorikshaw

मांगो उसी से जो दे खुशी से ।
कहो उसी से जो न कहे किसी से । 

:))))

Pankaj Chauhaan

Saari umr hum office mein mar gaye Ek pal to ab humein jeene do jeene do Give me some flight Give me some train Give me another chance I wanna go home once again Kandhon ko laptop Ke bojh ne jhukaya Client se jhoot bolna tho khud Manager ne sikhaya 4.5 ya 5 rating laaoge to chhuti, varna kismat futi Kaam kar kar ke pada Ungaliyon pe REVIEW, SCREEN aur REWORK ka chaala Is Project ne to sala poora.. Poora bheja pakka daala Career to gaya GF bhi gayi Ek pal to ab humein jeene do jeene do Saari umr hum office main jee liye Ek pal to ab humein jeene do jeene do Give me some flight Give me some train Give me another chance I wanna go home once again.

What about me?

...and I am wondering what about my (unfulfilled) wishes, needs & dreams?

 Just because I have stopped expressing my feelings & needs...does that mean they don't exist?

Just because I shoved my crushed feelings & desires, my shattered dreams, my needs - deep in my heart does that mean that my heart has turned into a stone?

Just because I am trying to brave life and accept the reality does that mean I don't feel the pain anymore?

Just because I have stopped asking God for anything does that mean that I don't have any needs, wishes & prayers?
  
and why the hell am I thinking about all this now?  Why am I getting distracted by emotions?.. my emotional needs when I decided to lock them up and push them in a corner?

Going with the flow...

I am going with the flow.

I believe that there are no co-incidences. There is a reason why we meet people, why we part, why things happen. Everything is planned by that one supreme power up there. 

God has been dropping hints to make me believe that I am on the right track and that he has some awesome plans for me.  I am keeping the faith and just going with the flow.

Ameeen :)

Khi khi khi...

Locked in my heart and cyberspace are lots of beautiful & funfilled moments and memories.Reading old emails, going through old chat conversation can been so comforting.Laughing out loudly while reading stupid, mindless and funny conversations.They instantly lift my mood and make me super happy.Read an old chat message. The chat conversation just transported me to those good times and  I started laughing. Suddenly, I realised I was too loud and it was late in the night so controlled my laughter.

khi khi khi

...hehheheh...still laughing  :))))

Bottled up!

I really want to write but I am not able to.I have so much to say because there is so much happening in and around my life. There are so many things running inside me - thoughts & emotions but I am unable to get them out. 

Ouch my back ache

My lower back-ache has gone bad to worse. 

The unbearable shooting pain has left me begging God for death. I feel like jumping off the roof. 

Painkillers, hot-water theraphy, exercise - nothing is helping. 

I feel so handicapped sometimes. There are days when I can't even turn while sleeping, leave behind getting up from bed to even drink water at night or even switch on the light. I feel miserable when I need help ..support getting out of bed. On days when my bro & domestic help are around, it is fine. But when they are not,  I really have to struggle to get up.

God, I really can't take it anymore.

Do all relationships come with an expiry date ?

I don't understand 'why do two wonderful people, who are deeply in love with each other, fight with each other like cats & dogs?

It breaks my heart when people choose to escape from a problem instead of facing it.

It breaks my heart when people choose the easier way out instead of talking it out... making it work.
  It breaks my heart to see people give more priority to their ego than the person they love.
  It breaks my heart to see relationships break. 
  It breaks my heart to see friends cry.
  It breaks my heart to see friends go through pain.
  It breaks my heart when bad things happen to good people. 

  Do all relationships come with an expiry date ?

Lost in the rat race

i just scribble about what i see and connect to. I write about things i dont want to boot out of my system.

Make Others Laugh, Himself Miserable

Sometimes I feel like being a circus clown. I feel miserable but make people laugh with my own misery, try to fool as if I know..... But at least I don’t ask anybody to drink tartaric acid, munch charcoal or sit on the heap of dung. I pretty much keep myself in my world. I hope my miserable writings force people to think that they are so much happy…I don’t have a word of condemnation, a word of criticism, not because there is no such subject to be condemned but I am laden with my burden voluntarily.

I don’t deserve anything. This is the only light I have caught this morning. I must stop gazing at the bait(s) placed by God. I am infectious and sorry, especially now, that I have done more injury to my friends and family than there have been blessings on them. They all say I am impulsive and moody, but this heart cries even on a single scratch of my loved ones. I only pray “God, let take my boat to the other shore.”

I am not a moist shadow
a light hearted ring
Nether I am a sudden ostentatious stature 
nor a directionless invader
I am staled dew drop
on the petal of my sacred blossom


:))))

Life

Life is hard when you don't have anybody with you, when there is nobody to stand with you , when you need someone, But this the fking truth of life that you are alone that you have nobody to stand by you when you need someone , everyone sees there own life. Nobody cares about anybody else, life may look beautiful but it isn’t. It’s bad it hurts it pains and its ugly that’s the truth which most of us don't want to understand. And don't want to believe because truth is ugly and it hurts.

If you think you have someone to stand by you in the time you need them, you are wrong this world is a big jungle where no one believe no one, where no one trusts no one believes you no one is yours, this is survival of the fittest, you sit all alone in night and cry you don't have a shoulder to cry, you don't have a hand to hold, you don't have anyone to hug, you are alone with your life. Your fking damn life.

Mai tasvir utarata hu

Kahin bajte hue suna tha ha ha ha ha....................

Mai tasvir utarata hu, bigadhee huyee hasino kee
zulfe sanvarta hu
phir zulfo ke saye me, mai raate guzarta hu

koyee hasina kitanee bhee magrur ho,husn ki duneeya me kitanee mashhur ho
pas ho ke dur ho, mastee me chur ho,daudi chalee aatee hain,mai jisko pukarta hu

Mai tasvir utarta hu

chand ki bhee naa padee jinpe kiran,maine dekhe unn hasino ke badan
meraa aisa hai chalan, janeja o janeman,tod ke sare parde, mai sabko niharta hu

hai mai tasvir utarta hu

thak ke sahil pe samundar so gaya,yaad teree aa gayee mai kho gaya
yeh gaya mai woh gaya, arre yeh mujhe kya ho gaya,

yeh gaya mai woh gaya, yeh mujhe kya ho gaya,nam teraa leta hu,mai jisko pukarta hu

it's okay to just surrender.

Inevitable is best accepted with serenity.

There are times when you absolutely see no solution. When you've thought and thought and prayed and prayed; when you've sat still in meditation listening for an answer and still no answer comes. There are times when it's okay to just surrender.


Zindagi tomorrow i m coming

:))))

Surviving..........

a moody & unreasonable boss
incompetent colleagues
office politics
people crunch
targets, targets, targets
cry babies at work
prolonged recession
no increments
salary cuts
a nagging domestic help
a killing backache
a bad tempered & cold landlady
Bills, bills and more bills
insurance premiums
drama queens at work
unexpected expenditures
unreachable phones
an unpredictable car
ill-mannered auto walas
erratic internet connection
match makers
cooking gas crisis
a long 'to do list' at home 
a longer 'to do list' at work
insomnia
migraine attacks
...surving life!


Yet to go along way offffffff


:((((

...Reality check

When you return home after a bad day, all you need is a big warm hug from a loved one to make you feel better.
When you return home with a throbbing headache, all you want to do is put your head in your mom's lap.
When you are upset, hurt, disappointed, lonely & tired, all you want to do is go off to sleep in the warm arms of the one you love ...who will protect you from the world.
You enter an empty house and realize that you just have yourself and that's when reality seeps in.
So, you laugh at yourself and remember the following lines with brimming eyes...

"If you can keep your head when all about you 
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,"
SIGH OF RELIEF :))))

Good ways to spend an evening - one

1. Leave office on time (ok, a li'il late works too)

2. Get a tank full of gas (short for gasoline, and referred to as petrol and diesel in India)
3. Find a direction to drive in... 
4. Set a countdown timer (e.g. I will drive for 25 minutes, and look for the first nice place to have tea)
5. DRIVE
6. Stop... 
7. Eat and have Chai
8. Come back!


I managed to do a 50km drive last night with a couple of friends and went till Virar……….

I love it! Life is uber cool!

:))))

Chai Shaaye Masti....

"If you are cold, 

tea will warm you.

 If you are too heated, 

it will cool you. 

If you are depressed,

 it will cheer you. 

If you are excited,

 it will calm you."

ye kahin padha tha :)))) ha ha ha

 

How many times

How many times I will write about life and how many times will i say Life sucks, Its so obvious that my entire blog says that life is bad and its the worst thing that can happen to someone , this evident from all the posts. It might look that i am a pessimist and I dont have anything in life that makes me happy.

If you dont have anything worth dying you are just wasting your time.
If you dont have anyone worth dying then also you are just wasting your life.

i have stopped making sense out of my blog may be i am confused getting more and more confused, may be I dont know what i want out of life. or maybe when i am getting what i was trying to get i find it not worth working for.

Life is a long journey with falls and climbs

Past is so different then present and future. Past is gone its over , present is reality and future is a dream.You can just remember past and realize that you dont even know where people are who were with you in past. you realize you dont even have failed to sustain relations which were important, you have failed to understand changing ways of life...

But you don't try to go back and mend ways, because there are no mending ways. Past is over and present is your life. you just try to make sure what went wrong in past dont go wrong in present.

You just wish everyone who was part of your past, remains happy, satisifed and content with their present and you try to do that with your own. You just wish that relations you have right now become better in future.  

In life there are permanent friends if not permanent enemies. There are people who will always think good for you , will want you to be happy, even if they dont talk to you, even if they are no more part of your life, you just think and pray same for them.


:))))

Want to travel across India

I have always thought of writing a blog more professionally more maturely but i believe i cant.i want it to be raw want to write what i think and not what people want to read...
Today i want to fly, I want to be free and be alone , travel across the world alone not in luxurious hotels and flights but want to see the world it really is. want to travel across India, staying in small villages trying to find the answer of life. want to know how people think about life. how religions look at it. and whats the meaning of life. 

I wish i do this one day.

:))))

Valentine's day, Friendship day

1st sunday of august--The world celebrates it as friendship day, 

14th February -  Valentine's day! 

The malls are full and so are cinema halls with groups of friends who take time out from their busy schedules to meet each other! Ever thought of spending a friendship day or valentine's day with your FAMILY? Not really because you have a busy schedule and this can be altered only for friends! Guys perhaps the priorities of the world have changed!

Family bonds replaced by Friendship Bands!

Whether the above statement is correct or not is purely subjective! Prioritizing these relationships is the need of the hour. Imagine about a day your friend is happy for standing first in his/her college or for some other achievement! What would you expect of him/her to do? Call you and tell you that he/she is the happiest person on earth? Subsequently, you discover that you are the last person to get the news or rather another friend of yours gives this news! How would you feel?? Doesn’t the same feeling grip your parents when you call up all your friends but fail to call them and inform them this?

To quote another example. Say your dad gets you stall tickets of a movie you desperately wished to see with great difficulty. Still you grumble about him not getting you balcony tickets. Aren’t you taking your parents for granted here? Tomorrow what if this turns out to be a conversation between you and your friend, how would YOU feel if you are in your dad’s shoes?
Its not that I feel not to have friends but the point is you need to draw a line somewhere as regards the time spent with them! Don't you ever feel that there is a need to spend sometime with the people at home !
Take some time out to say "MOM YOU ARE MY BEST FRIEND" OR "DAD I LOVE YOU"
There are people who go out with their parents on Mother's Day and Father's Day! Do you really need a specific day to express your love to them!

Its high time we need to think over it GUYS!

:))))

Valentines

Valentines Day doesn't have to be one day a year. Love with all of your heart and soul. Giving yourself completely to someone can be scary, but there is never a bad time to tell your loved one how you feel about them.

       The most amazing gift you can give someone is your heart. Cherish your time together and make every day Valentines Day but engagement rings don't hurt either!


So ??

FEBRUARY MONTH OF LOVE

FEBRUARY 

A month of Love and Lovers.
LOVE, a small word but containing a very deep feelings.......
when we ask to people-What is love?
Their reply may be like that.....
Love is honesty and trust
Love is helping one another.
Love is mutual respect.
Love means that differences can be worked out.
Love is reaching your dreams together.
Love is the connection of two hearts!

But can we really define LOVE.....hummmmmmmmmmmm...i dont think so.........

Love is a feeling, that we feel when we meet to someone who have the same feeling in his/her heart. But dont have words to say anything.......both(girl/boy)want to say somuch but cant able to show their feeling just because they dont want to loose each other. But my dear friends if you have someone so special and you love him/her so much then dont wait.........express your feeling if he/she loves you definitely will accept and your life will become heaven......but if he/she not accept your love it definitely doesn't mean that your life is hell or your life is finished, its only mean that he/she is not the right person you are looking for..........life never wait for anyone......so kya pata kal ho na ho...........


So my dear friends, If you want to tell me your first love story and how you propose your love one, you can share me on my comment box.

Find the missing Zzzz's

Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. Sleep. 

Help

I'm boooooooored!! Someone call for a rescue mission

:)

:)
 
:)

SMS's sometimes.

Some text fwd's on my fone really tick me off... i hate them... some find a place in my saved list.

This is one of the nice messages i got that always stays in my inbox
Life means : A winter evening, four friends, mild rain, four pegs of rum. Life means: 100 bucks for petrol, two rusty old bikes, an open road. Life means: Maggi noodles, a hostel room, 3.25am, sonu nigam and asha bhonsle on the radio. Life means: 1 prep leave, 1 night, 1 book, 8 duffers. Life means: 1 girl/ boy, 1 number, 4 friends and a fight.

Now life means: old friends, separate cities, separate lives and endless messages to stay in touch.

I somehow agree... another in this series

Ek din zindagi aise mukaam par pahuch jayegi
dosti sirf yaadon mein reh jayegi
har cup chai yaad doston ki dilayegi
aur haste haste fir aankhein bhar aayengi………….

Office ke cabin mein classroom nazar aayegi
par chahne par bhi proxy nahi lag payegi
paise to bahut hoga magar
unhe lutane ki wajah hi kho jayegi……….

jee le khulke is pal ko mere dost
kyunki zindagi in palon ko
fir se nahi dohrayegi!

:)

PENDING HAI

Pending hai,
Bahut saari baatein,ek cup coffee aur,chain ki neend bhari raatein
Pending hai,
Ek baar dil khol ke rona,zor zor se thahake laga kar hasna,aur bachho ki tarah sudh kho kar sona
Pending hai,
Khule maidan mein bhaagna,rail ki patri par balance bana kar chalna,aur doosre ke gharo mein jhaankna
Pending hai,
Kandhe par sar rakhna ,pyar se roothna aur manaana,aur achanak maathe ko choomna,Zindagi mein khwahishein kam nahi hoti,Shikwon ki list un ending hain,Jitna bhi haasil kar lo,kuch na kuch humesha Pending hai!

My Room's in a Mess

Dim lights flickering images on tv and cushions lying over the bed messy cupboard, overflowing laundary bag and shoes all over the floor

thats the state of my mind right now i know i need to clean it up but don't know where to start, oh! there are clothes hung behind my door i usually dust whatever is superficial and clean the mess once a week

but this time around i left it unattended and its grown into a pile i have shopped for new stuff and i don't know where to put it since the room is so overloaded, for me to fix it will take a while let's start by opening the windows and letting the sun warm the room clean the closet first coz it has webs all over by now empty half filled glasses, keep magazines in place i am working on it pretty fast and working on it how! one by one the room is cleaner and and wasnt really that tuff i love to put my feet on the cold relaxing floor i have rediscovered new spaces and found a lot of missing old things i m glad i began somewhere and appreciate life all the more...

:)

Hinterlands

Ibne Batuta 
Dono Taraf Se Bajati Hai Yeh
Durghatna Se Der Bhali Hai

The real growth lies in the lower pop strata towns .

Numbers are adding up from the countryside
This has been the situation for almost a decade now in the business and industry

But media is always a step forward.
i strongly believe that it is a change harbinger instead of an emulator
So when Vishal Bhardwaj makes his 2nd movie which is set in pure and raw UP Hindi , Anurag Kashyap makes Gulal with pure hindi mass lyrics and songs ..... the jump from developing to developed state has been made for the Hinterland (for the longest time refered as cow belt by the other developed states brethren)

Also it is a logical distribution expansion phenomenon.
Top 5 metros distribution moves to cover the class 2 towns as seen in telephony

aka for language in popular media ...
English gave way to few Hindi+English phrases; That moved to englicised Hindi or what we popularly call Hinglish;then pure Hindi happened and hold your breadth it is time for the  Shudh Desi version of the dialect as spoken by the masses to become the depicted version on the Bada Parda

The larger impact is that Hinterland from being apologetic is the new source of stylish original identity.
The metro cousins are at a loss. There is no unknown and treasured nuances of language there !
And i am at glee because my spontaneous flow of UP style phrases and words now make for an opening to an exotic cultural exploration which erstwhile was unnoticed or even invitation for slight contempt and apologetic stance from my side

Here's to the time of the Hinterland.

क्या ख़ास है उसके ख़तों में?

लोग पूछते हैं हम से कि पुराने ख़तों में ऐसा क्या है जो बार- बार पढ़ते  हो?

कैसे समझाए उन्हें कि कितनी यादें बसी हैं उन ख़तों में...
यादों के साथ बसी है...

ढेर सारी हंसी,
कई शरारतें,
कितने मज़ाक,
ढेर सारी बातें,
कुछ मासूम उमीदें,
कई खूबसूरत ख़्वाब,
कुछ झगड़े,
थोड़ी शिकायतें,
गहरा होता प्यार,
और प्यार का इज़हार,
थोड़ा रूठना,
थोडा मनाना,
कई मिन्नतें,
थोड़ी सी तड़प,
और थोड़े से आंसू,
कुछ गलत्फैमियां,
थोड़ी नादानियाँ,
और बेपनाह प्यार
बहुत से खूबसूरत पल,
बसे हैं इन्ह ख़तों में,
वोह हर एक पल,
जो मैंने गुज़ारा उनके साथ,
उन्ह ख़तों में
और वोह हर पल
जो गुज़ारा ख़्वाबों में,
उन पल,
उन यादों,
उन ख़्वाबों के सहारे ख़ुशी से कट रही है ज़िन्दगी
शुक्र है कि चाहे थोड़ी हि सही,
पर कुछ तो पल, कुछ तो ख़्वाब खुदा ने लिखे थे हमारे उनके साथ :)

Have I stopped enjoying life?

Where have all the simple joys of life gone?
Have we just forgotten to enjoy the small pleasures?
in everything while running behind fulfilling bigger dreams?
Why don’t we enjoy the drops of rain falling on our face instead of shielding it with an umbrella?
Why can’t we find time to stop and enjoy the smell of a flower on a bush by the side of the road?
Are there any bushes left by the side of the road in this jungle of concrete buildings?
Why do we talk to everyone else on the phone for hours but can’t spare even 5 minutes for family?
Why do we talk to our own siblings through messages in spite of living under the same roof?
Why can’t we smile at strangers on the street?
Why are we so frustrated all the time?
Why do we keep ourselves occupied? To run away from the worries in life?
But then why do we look at our worries as problems? Why don’t we look at them as challenges?
Why can’t we appreciate and enjoy the colours thrown in the sky by the rising sun?
Why can’t we sing our hearts out in public instead of acting ‘sophisticated’?
What is the definition of sophistication and why is it often just all about concealing your real feelings and emotions?
Why can’t there be a single moment when we can be ourselves?
Why can’t we laugh our hearts out when our happiness knows no bounds and cry like a baby when we are very badly hurt?

All these questions and many more keep popping in my mind and I keep wondering every day…why? Why are things the way they are? Why have we stopped living life in the true sense of it? And why have we stopped enjoying it? I remember having enjoyed small moments in life as a child. But now, I have myself entered this fake world while trying to keep up with others. Am I running away from my true self then? Or have I just changed as a person, over the years? Do I still feel like hopping around when I am happy? Yes, I do. Then why is it that I don’t do it? Why does a smile still curl up on my face with the first rain? Is it true that a baby continues to live in every grown up? May be it is. Then where has the baby in me gone? May be like everyone else, even I have locked it in a small room in the corner of my heart.

Now all that matters is my career and a nice job and money. This is all I desire for. But what about my desire to let myself free? In this race to win in life, I have stopped enjoying life.

Khud se hi darr raha hai woh aane wala kal

Khud se hi darr raha hai woh aane wala kal,
Ki guzari naummidi ke kisse tum yoon sunaate ho.

Duniya se to keh aaye tum ki zakhm hai halka,
Kyon dete ho dilaasa, kyon dil ko fir samjhaate ho.

Seedhi baat keh doon to rooth jaate hain mujhse,
Fir ilzaam bhi mujh par hi hai ki baatein kyon uljhaate ho.

Hosh apnaa tum kisi ke naam kar aaye,
Ab naam bhi apnaa, ainaa dekh kar batlaate ho.

BUSY BUSY..!!

Wow.!!Days are just flying by now without any time to make some updates on "my blog". I have my excuses for being so preoccupied..Since I’ve been so busy at office.i promise i will blog at least once a week now.!!! i guess that is for now.. i m really running out of stuff to write... but i will come back soon...

Boring Voicemail

I hate voicemails. In fact, I am not even comfortable leaving a voice message.
Most of the time I hang up once I realise that the phone is on voicemail. I would leave a voice message only in a very critical situation. When I leave a voice message, I am not able to say what I wanted to say. I fumble, murmur and then hang up.

Has this ever happened to you ? When you really wanted to talk to someone but his or her phone is on voicemail. You know that exchanging emails, SMSing or chatting on Google won't help because you REALLY want to talk to that person.

I know that I can always call back later and talk to my friend. But sometimes you just want to talk at that time, that moment...ussi waqt...because you have something important to say or tell which might lose its value later.

Suppose, it is an important day... special day for the person and you wanted to be the first person to wish the person but his or her damn phone is on voicemail. Ugh!!!
When you wish someone in person or over the phone it is different. You feel every word that comes out of your mouth - Wishes come out straight from the heart because you know the person is listening to you. And how do you that when you know that a machine is listening to it and recording it. At least, I can't do that. :(

Khair koi baat nahi...

Beacuse my wishes and prayers for the person are actually between God and me.
I shared them with God while having my daily conversation with ma friend. And I'm sure God will grant them and bless the person! :)
Aameen!

have a nice weekend :)

09 Things that made me HAPPY in year 2009

1. Ma Pa's 36th wedding anniversary.
2. Buying my blackberry and car.
3. My brother got,what he deserves.
4. Traveling & exploring.
5. Completing 6 yrs in Mumbai.
6. Being a part of best organization
7. Having Bhabhi & a kid over with me for a vacation.
8. Re-connecting with God.
9. http://aamiralired.blogspot.com - my blog

May 2010 give us many more reasons to be happy...happier :)))

:)))))
Life is beautiful :)

Time changes many............

There was a time when Jan 20 was a very important date, a very special date in my life.
It was 'her' birthday - the girl I ONCE loved deeply and madly.

This was long, long time back. I remember planning for her birthday - surprising her with small yet sweet gifts. I remember, once 'She' was away to Maharashtra for work on her birthday. I actually celebrated her birthday alone by quietly cutting a small cake at midnight. Innocent and pure love....it was beautiful.
Unfortunately things did not work out between us. She dumped me for another guy and it left me heartbroken and shattered. It took me a very long time to get over him. I remember sending her gifts, flowers, wishes on her birthday even when were not on talking terms. For years, I visited dargaah on her birthday and prayed for her success and happiness and hoping things would get better someday. Unfortunately, they didn't. I was left with bitter feelings. Yet deep down I wished her well.

I took a very, very long time but I moved on.

We never interacted. Common friends told me 'she' married the guy and was doing extremely well in her career. I also heard that she hurt a lot of old friends. she cheated them for money, betrayed people to move ahead in her career. I was upset to hear this.

Then last year, I heard from a friend that 'she' was going through a very bad phase. she was badly hit by the slowdown. she was jobless and was under debt. Strangely, I didn't feel sorry for her. I know that I'll sound ruthless, heartless and may be evil but I was happy and relieved to hear that she was in pain. I was surprised how time had changed my feelings for her.


This morning, on my way to work I checked the calendar. It took me more than 2 minutes to realise it was her birthday. In fact, I was initially confused if it was on Jan 20 or Jan 23. Surprised??? So was I.

I know that she is in deep pain and is still struggling for work. I feel sorry for her.
Times have changed. Feelings have changed. I have changed. Today, I feel nothing for her. Neither love nor hatred. What has not changed is - my yearly sms which carries my best wishes on her birthday. But she never replies.

I have finally forgiven her. I realised this when I sent her a SMS this morning wishing her well.

Guess what??? she replied to my message today. she thanked me and blessed me. I was pleasantly surprised.


I'm sure, time taught her some important lessons about life including - what goes around, comes around.

Painkiller for heart ache ???

Is there a painkiller for heartache?
Some medicine, some drug that can reduce one's heartache...take away the pain, the killing pain?
Pain which so unbearable and killing.

When you know that nothing in this world will help.

All you need is a BIG HUG from one person whose presence and absence makes all the difference but the person is not there...
and then you start looking for that ONE painkiller which can reduce your heartache.

It is killing me.

Mumbai Lovers Point

My friend emailed me this shyri

Ek to Manzile bhi uski thi, Rasta bhi uska thaa,Ek main akela tha, Kafila bhi uska thaa..
Sath-Sath chalne ki soch bhi uski thi, Phir raasta badalne ka faisla bhi uska thaa...
Aaj kyon akela hoon, Dil sawal karta hai, log to uske they, Kya KHUDA bhi uska thaaa....?

तेरे इंतज़ार से

खुद को खुश करने लिए, हम ने दिल को समझा दिया
आज हमने तेरे नाम से, खुद को एक ख़त लिख दिया

The Countdown begins

Ten days from today- on Jan 26, 2010, I will complete six years - a real time - in Mumbai.
Where did the last 6 years go?

My first day in Mumbai is still fresh in my mind :)Time really flies!!! sigh!

The next few posts on Aamir A will be dedicated to this last six years of my life!
I'll be walking down the memory lane, flipping back a few pages... few chapters of my life!

                                                       so keep glancing!!

:)

Bounce back :)

This morning, I was shocked to see myself in the mirror.I looked terribly sick..almost dead, ugly and old.
as I am feeling pain in ma back,so I decided to cheer myself a little.
I can't afford to be sad..at least today.What's so special about today? umm..you'll get to know in my next post,after shower -----------

Slipped into my fav basic blue jeans,Just ran my fingers through my hair ..then came in my confidence booster....my sun glass I applied.
I looked at myself in the mirror and smiled.
'Muaaah...I love you, handsome" I told myself with a smile, picked my bag and rushed to office,reached there @ sharp 8 am :))

As I walked down the stairs, I told myself -
"I cannot let myself be sad for long. Why must I feel sad and lonely?
I love myself and approve of myself.
I am a happy soul. I always get what I want. I will get what I want.
God loves me. My family loves me. My friends love me. They will never leave me.
I trust God. I trust my family and friends. I trust my love. And I trust myself.
My heart is full of love ...umm... over-flowing with love and I want to pour it...share it.
God is with me. He knows what I want, need and deserve and he will give it to me.
He will. I trust him."

:)
:)
:)

Learn a Bit........Laugh a Bit-There are many such monkeys around us, try to identify them

Someone emailed this really interesting short story to me this evening.I want to share it with you.

Ek din ek Kutta jungle main raasta kho gaya.

Tabhi usane dekha ek Sher uskii taraf aa raha hai.
Kutte ki saans rookh gayi. "Aaj to kaam tamaam mera!" usne socha.
Phir usne saamane kuchh sookhi haddiyan padi dekhi. Woh aate hue Sher ki
taraf peeth kar ke baith gaya aur ek sookhi hadii ko choosne laga aur zor
zor se bolne laga, "wah! Sher ko khaane ka mazaa hi kuch aur hai. Ek aur
mil jaaye to poori daawat ho jayegi !"
Aur usne zor se dakaar mari. Is bar Sher soch mein pad gayaa.
Usne socha "ye kutta to sher ka shikar karta hai! Jaan bacha kar bhago!"
Aur sher wahan se jaan bachaa ke bhag gaya.
Ped par baitha ek Bandar yeh sab tamasha dekh raha tha. Usne socha yeh
mauka achha hai sher ko saari kahani bata deta hoon.
Fir Sher se dosti bhi ho jayegi aur usse zindagi bhar ke liye jaan ka
khatra dur ho jayega..
Woh phataphat sher ke pichhe bhaaga. Kutte ne Bandar ko jaate hue dekh liya
aur samajh gayaki koi locha hai.
Udhar Bandar ne sher ko sab bata diya ki kaise kutte ne use bewakoof banaya
hai. Sher zor se dahada, "chal mere saath abhi uski leela khatam karta
hoon" aur Bandar ko apani peeth par baitha kar sher kutte ki taraf lapka.

Can u imagine the quick management by the DOG?
-
-
-
-
-
Kutte ne sher ko aate dekha to ek baar phir uskii taraf peeth karke baith
gaya aur zor zor se bolne laga, "Is Bandar ko bheje huye 1 ghanta ho gaya,
Saala ek Sher bhi nahin pataa kar la sakta!"

Ha ha ha ha ha

Moral of the story:

There are many such monkeys around us, try to identify them.

Why BLOG ?

   when the style of the blogs started... or i mite say... the trend of the blogs... i usually used to wonder... what is that the one thing that peole find so amusing of writing and keeping it to a constrained number of people... and what sense does it make to write your own thoughts varying from the tiniest little thing to the most controversial opininons of self...

I have read ma friends blog ranging from personal experiences that are from day to day life like mine... and then some of the blogs of normal looking people having extra ordinary... issues...and views of their own... which conflict with the biggest most influential people and media around... and then there are some where...actually words flow from their heart or mind...
and there are some sort of writers hiding in the closet..trying to make it in this cruel world of competition...and then there are some like me... who just for the sake of it...come here to express osmething which they usually do not do...and yet want to share it with some audience....

now here i mite say... that i for a regular person... feel good to write stuff out of my mind...and get heard to certain people...matering to nothing else.... but a phone call later to discuss this the same.... but then... it feels really good...

some feel..... that they actually make a difference to the society.... and that they are contributing to bigger picture called Idea called India....and then there are some who try to gain attention form this little media.... and get the zeal of Attention.. and then be happy of all the attention that they got cos... thats all they get.... for the lifetime

but then....actually speaking.... Why a blog....????

why not some other media.... hmmm ...???

when i gave it a thought... media's available are those like TV, newspaper, journals... magaznes.. fm radio... and may be a website... but then... trying to get coverage... anywhere here..needs some or the other funds to start... and in the end you may or may not get success.... of actually putting your stuff out there....

but BLOG... the easiest most way... makes you look cool.... and then you have your own space... needs no funding..no management issue... no NOTHNG...

its the WAY to get noticed... and heard.... WHAT SAY????

hmm... so here im... an innocent person trying to get heard.... and a BLOGGER for a very tiny reason....

but yeah... i have my space and my opinions... and then i have certain....people to back too... so WAY to go....and ALL THUMBS UP for the blogs all around.... and to all BLOGGERS.... . keep Blogging.... :)

                                

                                 Cya  for now,will write more someother time!

Difficult People---------Read this somewhere on the net

"Difficult people are very important - they teach you tolerance and acceptance. If all was going your way all the time, you would become a spoiled child. Difficult people are just one of the ways God teaches us to expand beyond our egos and accept other perspectives on life."

                                                       I can't agree more!

Mere Sapnon se bhare NAINA

One of the things that I am looking forward to in 2010 is....making a big move in my profession :))
Umm..don't confuse this with some huge jump in the corp ladder.
 NO, sweeties. I am very much out of the rat race.
 I'm looking for a drastic change in my career and I hope in happens by the end of 2010.
 Enough of what I've done for all these years.
Wanna thank God and my family for helping me fulfill my small dreams..to achieve whatever I've achieved so far.
             But it is time to do something else now...umm...something 'different' :)
It's time to think, plan and.... 'action'....umm in short make it HAPPEN.

God,please be with me.

Happy days are here again

I just realised that I'm happy again! Kinda lost it for a bit, but it's back in full force! And it makes me so happy! I'm back in that mood again... where all I want to do is dance and sing the entire day and just spend some nonsensical hours with my friends, doing absolutely nothing!

And then I was like wondering, how the hell did all the moodiness go? I was worried I was actually going to start losing friends, I was that bad. And there's only that much, before people start realising you're just being a big fat fake! So anyway, I got the answer to my question pretty quick. No it wasn't like a light bulb going off, nor was it like that sudden flash of lightening! It was more like 'Elementary, my dear friends!'

I realised that since I left singapore (however fun it was and how much ever I loved going to office everyday... for more reason than one :P) I've just been sane. I haven't blown my top off, I haven't yelled the hell out of anyone, or got any of my 'tension and stress' headaches/ stomach aches. All along, when I was out there achieving something, all I really needed to be doing was resting! And behaving like the normal 28 year old I (think?) I am, who spent the entire day with his friends and partied every night!

All that hard work and for what? The simple realisation that I need to slow down, spend some time chilling and basically enjoy life!! And to think, I knew that all along anyway. But I guess that's why they say 'everything happens for a reason' in the first place.

And for my happy mood, I hope it lasts :)

I've missed it too much!!